We are increasingly talking about the ‘social customer’. What was once a customer is now a social customer. Just as Customer Relationship Management or CRM is now Social CRM. The reasons are obvious. People use social media, also in their interactions with companies and buying decisions. People have more control in communication and interaction processes and over their customer journey. As I have written so many times before before: “there is a shift from selling to buying”.

Unfortunately I have noticed that many professionals, specifically in the social media marketing expert sphere, interpret all this in a very black & white way. “Selling” and “sales” seem to suddenly have become taboo words. Nevertheless everything we do, as business people, marketers and even in our private lives, often boils down to selling. But then selling as it should be.

Why customer relationships are not enough

Back to the social customer. Buyers gather information online and ask for advice from their peers. They also use social media and that has, certainly in B2B, an influence on sales and especially on the length and efficiency of selling processes and thus sales cycles, as these exist.

What and how we sell has changed: sales based on good relationships with our customers (including the monthly lunch or round of golf), the benefits and advantages of our products and services and our own sales initiatives (cold calling, pitching, etc…) are often not enough anymore.

Clients want us to think with them: about their business (or life for instance) and how to improve it. We also sell more than products or services: today we sell thought leadership, know-how, perceived value, interactions and trust.

In practice we see that in this digital world people find our companies and products more than our sales and marketing efforts find them. The shift from selling to buying is a fact and the entire concept of inbound marketing and modern lead nurturing procedures is based on it.

The black and white vision of social media marketing

Customer engagement, customer relationships, customer service, customer loyalty and customer advocacy are the new mantras in a social media world where word of mouth is king and conversations are Walhalla.

Everyone looks at inbound marketing, relationship marketing and engagement marketing, basically what social media marketing boils down to, as the Holy Grail in the customer-controlled world. Direct marketing no longer exists, selling has become a dirty word and marketing should not be intrusive. Conversations, that’s what it seems to be all about.

Well, it is not. This black & white vision is nonsense. I don’t deny the social and other changes (if you know me, you know I stand behind them and even am "preaching" them in my somewhat different style and always from an integrated and customer-centric perspective), but it is about time that we look at the reality and at what is really essential.

Email marketing is not dead, direct marketing is not dead and sales are definitely not dead. The only thing that changes are the tactics and we finally return to the roots: asking ourselves what is good sales and marketing?

We are selling more than ever: value and understanding prevail over channels

The answer to this question lies in customer-centricity and value-added thinking throughout the whole value chain. Value is function of customer-centricity and of relevance in all business procedures and interactions with visitors, customers and prospects. But value is also function of the business objectives which we strive for. Today that is more than ever customer loyalty and engagement through a thorough understanding of the needs of people and customers and even the needs of their customers. Our clients want us to think WITH them, remember?. They don’t want relationships that are non-profitable, irrelevant or not satisfying in any way.

The unilateral focus on ‘conversations’ and ‘relationships’ in a connected and ‘social’ world is a misconception. What matters most is still the value that is generated as a result, both for our clients and our businesses. It’s that value that we sell. And to sell it, we must first sell reputation, trust and relevant information. We have to earn it.

Learning to listen is an important factor here, as you know. In order to listen we should basically work and think cross- and multi-channel. Social media obviously forms a part of this customer-centric and cross-channel reality.

The rules may have changed, but the essence is still the same. And a good seller has always known it. Sales is not a dirty word. And relationships are not enough. A deep, true, holistic, profound and intelligent view on the needs of our customers and theirs however is. In fact it is the starting point of everything.

Channels and media, including what we call ‘social media’, are merely function of it. People don’t care how their needs are met: they want a partner that meets them and thinks with them. That is sales. As it is supposed to be. Period.

What do you think?

J-P De Clerck is a 360 degrees interactive marketing, content, conversion and social media consultant. You can connect with him on Twitter, his site or his personal blog.